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| The Language of Coaching |
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Coaching is a unique and powerful approach to self development and transformation. To gain a closer understanding of what coaching is about here is a glossary of definitions of the language you will hear. Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a communication model and a common coaching model that looks at our mind (Neuro)-our thoughts and filtration system, our language (linguistic) which incorporates verbal and non verbal Communication to our external world as well as our internal thoughts and our map of the world (programming) which is basically the way we are wired. NLP includes our strategies (see below) and modeling behavior that will lead us towards our goals. It is based on the presupposition that nothing has meaning except the meaning we give it- which means every moment of our lives is merely just a perception that we choose to have. Change our perceptions and change our meanings- therefore ultimately changing our reality. Reality is therefore whatever we choose it to be. Some of the powerful intervention techniques an NLP practitioner will utilize are anchoring, strategy elicitation, phobia busting, parts integration and TIME LINE THERAPY (to name only a few) Judgment Free Zone A common phrase used in coaching which means that within a coaching session there is no right or wrong- the truth that arises for a client is right based on their own past experiences and filtration system. A coach holds no judgment and acts merely as a tour guide to assist a client on their own journey towards their own truth. It is the highest level of respect given to a person based on psychological research that we are all "wired" uniquely. Conversation like no other Coaching is a unique conversation whereby you are asked thought provoking questions on topics you may have never thought of. For example- what is your deep love strategy/how do you know you are loved by someone? Representational Systems This is the way we code or process information which is through our senses visual (sight), auditory (sounds), Kinesthetic (feelings), Gustatory (taste) and olfactory(smell). It also involves what we tell ourselves. Goal My own translation...Growth Over A Lifetime Unconscious Mind- The mind of the body. Reframe This involves changing the context or content or perception of a thought or statement so that an idea has a different more positive meaning. Modeling The process of eliciting a persons strategy for whatever it is you are aiming to achieve so that by understanding their strategies you can model the behavior needed to achieve the same goal. Cause and Effect Basic Premise: I am now at Cause for all the effects in my life Most of us live our day to day in effect of what life throws at us: "If only they were more .... If only I had more.... If only they listened...." When our internal language shifts to the understanding that we create everything in our lives then we live our lives at cause: "I choose to have ..... in my life I choose to perceive them as ...... I choose to communicate more effectively." Focus What we focus on is what we get to the exclusion of anything else. Which means that it is vital to understand what we are focusing on and know that if we change our focus then we have greater clarity of where we are going to and how to get there. Visualization This is a powerful coaching process assisting the client to create a mental image with their minds eye about an object, event, person or situation. Using our imagination we can visualize anything which means creating the picture our unconscious mind requires to bring it to life. Internal Dialogue This is our inner voice that forever has its say. In coaching we look at the power of your internal dialogue and whether it is serving you or holding you back. What we say to ourselves consistently creates our reality. Belief Any feeling of certainty we attach to something. In the coaching process we look to see what beliefs are serving you and what beliefs are limiting you and aim to dissolve any limiting beliefs. Limiting Belief A belief we self created that does not serve or support us in our pathway forward. Our limiting beliefs are the chains that hold us back from achieving our deepest desires. Defining Moment Any moment in our lives that shaped us and influenced us into being who we are and what we choose; an event in our lives whereby we were forced to gain new learning's and new beliefs and judgments (could be positive or negative). In coaching it is not the event as such that we look at but more the meaning and interpretations and learnings attached to the event. PHOBIA An intense irrational fear that person believes as reality Value Anything we perceive as right or wrong. It is an emotional state that we strive for and acts as a measuring system to constantly access our world. Strategy The way we do what we do. It is a sequence of behaviors that are done consistently every time to achieve the exact result. We have a strategy for everything we do. Ideal Self The person we know we need to be to achieve our goals. It is the voice that comes from deep within, the voice below the conscious mind. Self Actualization The accomplishment of reaching the highest goals and desires we set out for our self- this is a journey not a destination. Perception The meaning we attach to sensory data through our filtration system. "You cannot see anything outside of you that isn't you" Carl Jung Filtration system It has been found that every second our brain takes in two million bits of information. Due to our filtration system which is made up of our beliefs, experiences, memories and values we only process 7 +/- 2 chunks of information. Overwhelm then is simply taking in an overload of information that the brain cannot process. Active Listening This is the gracious ability to listen to a person for the sole reason of understanding their model of the world. It is not about responding; it's about hearing a person's language and clarifying their meanings so as not to confuse with our own meanings. This is the respectful role of a coach and is what makes the coaching process so powerful-no one will listen to you like your coach! Reality Although there are natural (universal) laws of nature reality is really what we choose it to be based on our perceptions. If we really think about it there is only our own reality. Emotional Intelligence (EQ) Daniel Goleman (one of the most recent speakers of EQ in Corporate America) breaks down EQ to be the following:
Researchers have found that key successful people have a higher EQ then IQ. This enables them to manage themselves and manage people which mean true leadership and management and connecting with people on a deep devel. It is an ability to have heightened perceptions of emotional behavior around you. Utilization Utilizing what we have to create success or transformation in our lives. Time is a great example of utilization. Manifestation Utilizing the power of our mind and the power of our thoughts for creation. Behavioral flexibility Adapting our behavior to be who we need to be to achieve our goals. If we fail we alter ourselves to do something different again and again until we succeed. Like EQ, it has been found that successful individuals have great behavioral flexibility and are able to reinvent and recreate themselves. |
